Choosing the right life partner is too important a responsibility, so it must never be left to chance or some recommendations from certain individuals.

Frankly, choosing the right life partner is still a possibility today as ever. Since I started marriage counselling and relationship coaching, one of the greatest inspirations I have received in my spirit ever is that: “Anyone who misses it in marriage might have as well missed it in life.” This is so profound for those who have come to understand the intricacies and the interwovenness of the concept of marriage in the lives of couples. Hence, all who are unmarried must as a matter of urgency show great care before they say “Yes I do” to any prospect.

Unfortunately, there are millions of couples across the world today whose marriage is their greatest regret due to the wrong choice of partner. In a counselling case I once handled, a brother told me that for about ten years he’s been married to his wife, he has not been able to accomplish any good thing per se (which was true), and I browsed through the wife’s life, she also has been at a standstill all through those years.

The husband told me that the only period he enjoyed the marriage in ten years was the first six months after the wedding. Wow!
They practically lived like cat and dog for ten years with their children watching them fight as if it were a movie. Is this marriage according to God’s plan? Of course not. Scripture made it unambiguously clear that “Two are better than one” (Eccles.9:14). The truth is, anyone can get it right in marriage matters if they are willing to and if they are also ready to undergo the needful preparations.

“If you want to have a great marriage you must admit that: Being single is a kind of life and being married is an entirely different kind of lifestyle.”

For all those who are unmarried reading this piece, it’s high time we came to terms with the fact that choosing a life partner that will not be regretted is not an experience anyone stumbles unto. Instead, it is most realizable by adopting the right process and imbibing the required preparations. It does not happen by wishful thinking or through some lazy man’s approach. Choosing the right life partner is something you must be willing to accept responsibility for.
Only responsible people get married to their right mate and make the most of it. Responsibility is from the two words: ‘Response’ and ‘Ability’. It means having the ability to respond to situations because you know what to do or what is expected of you when choosing the right life partner.

ALSO READ, “Whom You Marry Often Than Not Determines Where You Will Spend Eternity”.- Evang. Gloria Bamiloye.

A fruitful relationship and a glorious marriage often begin with getting it right with the choice of a life partner. Your choice will make or mar you. Therefore, everyone intending to get married must be humble enough to learn how to make the right choice without any regret. Now, this is the essence of this special teaching.

Before I go further, I want to say emphatically that virtually all humans have a destiny with marriage. That is, almost everyone born into this world has an in-built urge to become married someday. And each of us would land on either the better or worse side of our lives depending on whom we choose to spend the rest of our lives with.
A renowned clergy, Pastor E. A Adeboye said, in a book he co-authored with his wife titled ‘Heaven in Your Home’, that: “Having a successful marriage is to a high degree dependent on your choice of marriage partner.”
Believe me, this true statement coming from a man who has a wealth of experience (on many sides) and has been married for over 50yrs.

About seven years ago a brother gave me a book he authored while I visited his family. He happened to be an occasional visiting member to the parish I Pastored then. He is a Pastor in his owner right too but chose from time to time to fellowship with us. For a long while, I did not read the book. But one day I think as I was arranging my bag or my table, I stumbled on the book and I was moved in the Spirit to read the book and I didn’t regret it. The author said something profound that the Holy Spirit wanted me to discover. He said: “There is no wrong step without a consequence likewise there is no right step without a reward.”
If I am to relate it to our subject matter it will mean if you make a wrong choice of a life partner by any means, the consequences automatically follow suit but if you choose right, the rewards will fill you and make a significant difference in your life.

Among other things the person you choose to marry will determine the foundation of your marriage and the kind of marriage, you will have.
And the foundation of your marital relationship inevitably determines the kind of structure you will be able to build on it.
Similarly, it is your depth that will always set the pace for your height in anything including marriage.

HAVE YOU READ, The Right Keys To Winning In Marriage

Now, let’s go deeper as I discuss a few nuggets about making the right choice of a life partner.

1. The Next Most Important Decision of Life You Will Ever Makes After Your Salvation Is The Choice Of Whom To Marry.

As such as an individual seeking a complementary destiny partner you need to understand the gravity and the priority of making the right choice. Then, also, ensure you approach it with reverence and a good sense of responsibility if you don’t want to regret the choice you will make. So when I see singles toying with this decision, I know it’s because they don’t understand the gravity of what they are doing. I am aware that some singles decide to marry each other on the ground of familiarity; unknown to them that familiarity does not guarantee true friendship. Moreso, one may become familiar with a person because you’ve been relating together over some time and yet you are not compatible with the person in destiny.

For instance, how would you decide to marry a brother or sister just because both of you go for a particular meeting together periodically or since you both serve in the same unit in the office or church? Now, don’t get this twisted, I am not insinuating that a marriage cannot possibly happen in cases like these but my point is, it should not be solely based on familiarity. That you feel comfortable around some persons whenever you are together due to certain necessities or meeting demands should not make you conclude that they are good marriage material. Your life partner is far greater in status intrinsically than a colleague or local church member.

For me, that is not solid enough to know a man or woman who fits into your destiny. Such a marriage decision may be said to come more from an emotional pull than a heart of conviction. And once there is no conviction, distortion could easily set in in the future. I have counselled some couples who actually got married on this premise and now they are having serious troubles with their spouses and in law.

Lastly, on this note, the decision about whom to marry is too sensitive and slippery for any individual to allow other persons to administer. It’s something you must be prepared to take responsibility for personally.

If you have been inspired by this submission on how to go about choosing a life partner, then watch out for the concluding part of it on this blog soonest.

©️ MAGI

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SEE ALSO, Can My Pastor, A Prophet Or Parents Choose A Spouse For Me? (They Told Me To Marry You -2)