Superhusbands - Marriage as God Intended

By Seyi Igunsabi

Personally, in my capacity as a spiritual leader and a relationship coach and counsellor, I have met women who have zero regards for their husbands. There are those whom at any point they become embitterd against their husband due to uncharitable acts, wished them misfortunes. This should not be so.

A wise woman and a virtuous wife should not be caught up in this kind of spousal misdemeanors. One thing women must begin to come to term with in this era is this – a woman that wants her husband to treat her like a queen must be prepared to relate with him as a king too.

Your husband’s fortunes, and perhaps misfortunes, are intrinsically yours too. So it is a wise thing for a wife to make a commitment to seek her husband’s welfare with the aim of bringing out the best in him. While this is being achieved, watch how things will begin to fall into place for you and your family at large.

The true picture of things is that -you can actually have a man of your dream, a superman to speak, but you have a responsibility towards this too being his wife.

Here are some guidelines, but not limited to these, for achieving this worthwhile feat:

1. Respect Him.

By the grace of God and with my counselling experience, I have the audacity to say one of the commonest attitude that put off (demoralize, dishearten, offend , scare off, disgust) a lot of men in their marriage and home is absence of respect (honour, reverence) from their wife. Men are naturally pleased with a woman that respects them. If there is one thing I know that deters and turns off most men in the home it is a confrontational and resistant wife.

2. Support Him.

This is the primary role God Himself gave every woman who is to be a wife to a man called her husband. In Gen. 2:18, God said unequivocally- “… I will make him a helper (supporter,) comparable to him.” Listen woman , there shouldn’t be a better supporter of your spouse than you whether you seem to have what it takes or not. At best never stop to support him morally.

3. Encourage Him.

Wise women understand this. Great wives do this. As a married woman one of the greatest damage you would do to your husband and invariably yourself, is to take delight in talking him down instead of being his best encourager. Can I tell you this? Woman, the best encourager of your husband is you. No one else will really occupy that space in his life. As a matter of fact, anyone who encourages your husband more than you could steal his heart from you.

4. Avoid Confronting Him.

All men hate confrontation. You may quote this anywhere. Learn to use the weapon of reasoning with your man even when he is on the wrong side of the divide. Men are naturally egoistic, so you must tread softly when arguments ensue with your husband. I understand that once in a while a woman (wife) may just want to be blunt with her spouse on a matter and it may resemble confrontation. Whatever the case may be, learn to give your man his place as the head by always using the appeal or reasoning method.

5. Treat His People Like Your People.

In fact, if it is within your power, I advise that you treat them even better than your own relations occasionally. No woman does this that will not get her hubby’s back. Many wives get their husband really angry in this area of family affairs. I can confidently tell you that wives who give their husband’s relations less treatment than they accord to theirs, make themselves very vulnerable in the home.

6. Don’t Stage a Battle Against Your In-law For His Sake.

A friend of mine said: “A woman stands the chance to win the battle against in-law only when the husband is at the frontline of the battle. I understand the temptation may be there sometimes but always be prepared to resist it. Any battle against in-law that your husband can not champion for you, his wife, is an unnecessary battle. Leave it! Doing battles with in-law becomes more difficult for a woman to win her husband’s heart if he still maintains close relationships with his relations at her own peril.

7. Take Care of Him.

Men are like ‘babies’, they need to be taken care of, if you don’t want them to mess up the home. Take care of his meal times, so much that he looks forward to eating at home with excitement. Take care of his ego; that is, make him always feel like a man around you by giving him the lead role in virtually everything, everytime.

Take care of him, when he is in his low moments, your words of succor and assurance will surely lift up his spirit.

8. Give Him The Sex He Needs.

Wise wives don’t wisecrack with sexual needs of their husbands. Sex is more or less food to an average man. Sex may be mere pleasure and fun to female folks but with men, sex is like food. It is energy to them. With his corporation ensure your sex life is spiced up as much as possible.

There is no woman who does these aforementioned things, that will be unfruitful ( fail) or suffer in marriage.

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