It was intentional on our side, to maintain peace in our home and between us, as much as God helps us. More so, we understood that peace with each other is peace with God. On this premise, misunderstandings hardly last twenty-four hours in all our years of marriage. Ocassionally, pursuing peace in your marriage would require that you’d be prepared to give up your right at times, before your partner and in-laws, even though you are right and chaste in manners.

Also, it could make you adjust your likes and dislikes. For example, my wife’s extended family do not make much of birthday celebrations but in my family root, we do exceedingly. A defaulter is seen as a serious offender in my extended family circle. But over the years my wife has taken it up as a responsibility to celebrate my siblings and parents on their birthdays. Whereas it is still not a welcome development among her siblings. Furthermore, it is worthy of note that pursuing peace will demand making sacrifices more often than not. This too is a common occurrence in our marriage which has strengthened us and contributed immensely to our marital bliss and family success in almost two decades.

Dwelling in peace as a couple and family must be intentional and done with an understanding of the pros and cons; otherwise peace will easily stray from the marriage.

SEE ALSO, 20 Things Couples Do That Lead to Spousal Abuse.

3) The absence of peace in a marriage is not just threatening to marital success, sometimes it could be life-threatening too.

You will agree with me that there are too many real-life stories all over the world that buttress this fact. Several lives have been lost to the cold arms of death as a result of domestic violence and provocations between couples. These fatal provocations are usually outcomes of little incessant conflicts and sometimes aggravated misunderstandings that they fail to resolve as it were. I plead with you, do not trade your peace for your pride as a man or a successful woman as the case may be.
Singles, don’t settle down with a destiny waster and joy-killer as a partner, all in the name of marriage. You need that peace more than cars, money, or a visa to travel abroad.

In the year 2020, there was a very pathetic story of a young man of thirty-nine who murdered himself and his fiancée (twenty-five) in Lagos, Nigeria, West Africa. They had issues with the paternity of one of their two sons; although it was out of place for them to have had children out of wedlock. Anyway, it made the guy lose his peace I presume and he could see neither a future with his fiancée nor for himself. So he decided to murder his fiancée with a knife because of a breach of trust and then he committed suicide as well.

4) You live for peace in marriage, you don’t work for it.

Keep this in mind, as long as you are in a marital relationship: no amount of possessions will ever equate or substitute peace in your marriage and home (Prov. 17:1). Even your position, status or achievements cannot suffice for peace in the marriage. So let’s be careful how we work so hard to provide things necessary for life and family welfare, thinking they’d give us peace in the home and our hearts.
Recently, while studying I understood that- “Peace in marriage is not a thing you work for but something you live for.”
It is not about the things at your disposal rather it is about the beings in the union. Peace in a marital union answers more to principles guiding the union more than the possessions that surround it.

BROWSE THIS, How to Identify a Domineering Person Before You Marry Him or Her.

It blossoms through a lifestyle, not by some work expertise, juicy career height or position being held in any place. Even in general life, material possessions do not guarantee the peace of men. Jesus elucidated this too in Luke 12:15.
This is one truth that many couples are yet to admit and internalize, yet many of them wonder why marital bliss eludes them so easily.
True peace starts from within and flows towards every other thing outside our being. So peace indicators are more of things we can’t see than what the eyes can see. They are more often than not- attitudinal, spiritual and character-based.

Of course, these are not virtues you work for but live by and for.

5) If you want to get the best out of your partner, give him or her peace in the marriage and home.

This is especially for the women folks.

Proverbs 21:19
“Better to dwell in the wilderness, Than with a contentious and angry woman.”

Women by nature tend to have more power to broker peace in the home and marriage than men. Besides, they are more patient in spirit than men; many circumstances of life establish this. Following this, I counsel that women should make peace in their home an utmost priority and trust God to help them attain it against all odds. However, both husband and wife will certainly be more productive and resourceful in their marital relationship and general life if they bask in peace as much as their partner corporates.

Final Counsel:

Until you have peace in marriage, every other thing you have worked for may choke life and fulfilment out of you, besides endangering your eternal rest; even your children’s future and children’s children may be affected.

Seyi Igunsabi-Perez
(Family Life Practitioner, Relationship Manager, Marriage Counsellor & Seminar Facilitator)

☎️ 0701 020 0027, 0803 308 1837
📩 seyiigun4christ@gmail.com
magism@marriageasGodintended.com
Instagram @pstseyiperez
Twitter @pstseyiperez

©️ M.A.G.I

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